12 Things They Never Told Me About Twitter.

Southern Nigeria, Jan 2010.

Chi-chi : Are you on Twitter?

Me: What is that?

Chi-Chi: A Social Media network. Like Facebook. You’ll love it! Just get it on your Ph–

Me: Forget it. Facebook is a handful already. I can’t.

Chi-Chi: Forget Facebook! Twitter is the place to be! You get to meet and tweet at all your favourite Celebs from all around the world….

Me: ( laughing ) … And? How does that help the pump prices?

Chi-Chi: Na you sabi, abeg Just try it. You’ll thank me later I promise.

Me: Hian! Okay o! But Chi-Chi, if this flops….

Western Nigeria, November 2013.

It has been about two years on this roller coaster ride called Twitter. Everytime I remember that talk with Chi-Chi I am just amazed at the power of Ignorance. My Ignorance. And its ability to keep us holed up, bound, trapped in old ways, habits, religions and relationships.

Today, I want to share twelve things I have learnt, from the minute I took the plunge into this crazy Aviaspora pool, to date. Six today, six later. I pray this will give someone out there a heads up on their Twitter game, and courage to try something new this week.

After all ‘strangers are friends we haven’t met yet.’


1. Choose a short and catchy name.
Hey, Welcome To Twitter! Great to have here Mr Samaila Toochukwu NtantaOffiong Jaiyesola!

I believed all that, but no one told me that a successful twitter handle is as brief as possible. Not too short, as to be forgettable, not too long as to stick out by the sides. Just right. It took me all of 4 months to morph into StNaija. But it was worth it. 🙂

2. Break your egg.

Pictures are a universal language. The world, is a globe. One thing any Twitter user can understand is pictures. The Egg you get when you open an account needs to be changed. Fast. More on this in Part 2. 🙂

3. Create or Carve or Kidnap a niche

Where do you belong? What sort of things are you

1. Very knowledgeable about

2. Very Enthusiastic about.

Let the answers to these questions guide your Follow/unfollow, Tweet/Retweet, Mention/Ignore actions. On Twitter, Less is often more.

4. Decide why you are here

Why did you open a Twitter account?

To read? Inform? Make money? Meet people? Stay current? More on this in Part 2.

5. Watch your Profile

How well do you know your statistics?

How do they compete with ‘Industry’ averages?

What are your ratios? (More on those in…you got it…part 2.)

6. Guard it Jealously.

Yup. You have to watch that basket. Else you’ll find that your eggs hatched but some wicked tweet thief came and stole them all.

What are your strategies to keep people following you? (???)


I hope you enjoyed that. What didn’t they tell you about Twitter? Please share with us below.

Munto Obrigado/a

The Etisalat Flash Fiction Prize, Top 20 List Is Out, We Made It!

The Etisalat Flash Fiction Top 20 List is out and our entry, Dressed Like A Prince, is on it.

We wish to thank all of you that read, liked, voted, shared, tweeted about, reviewed, endured and celebrated the #DressedLikeAPrince campaign.

You are the real heroes.
This Victory is yours, and we celebrate you.

May people gather to support you as you supported us. May you always have the help you need to realise your dreams. Amen.


Our other story, A Show Fit For A King, Is still up for Facebook Likes!


1.Visit the : Institute of Certified Communicators Facebook page. or click here: https://t.co/Lqi0hWkGba

2.Look for Story #3: A Show Fit For A King by N. Bassey.

3. Read & Like: A Show Fit For A King

4. Tell all your Facebook friends etc about it.

Thank you for supporting (y)our stories,

Thank you for supporting African Literature,

Thank you for supporting The A Show Fit For A King campaign!